WTFWJD

Okay guys.... totally been holding out on you.

Go to this website.

http://wtfwjdbitch.blogspot.com/

it will change your life.


(your life.)

A graph can say it all...

see more Funny Graphs

Sonic isn't as cool as I want it to be... and chocolate chip cookies don't even sound good.

Okay, went to play video games on this horrible rainy afternoon, won about 800 tickets and felt like a total bad ass as Ryan pulls out our 3000 + ticket card to add the tickets to. Him and Desimone played air hockey and threw the puck at a bystander. Hit them in the crotch. Didn't see it, but I wish I did.

After spending about $32 on tokens, we decided to go home and, what do you know, there is a brand spanking new Sonic that they built in town. I don't know about you, but for the last 2 to 3 years of my life, my commercials always contained reference to a Sonic, and damn, did the food look good.

Well they built one.

And I wish they hadn't.

Honestly, the food was greasy... all of it. And not the good kind of greasy. I felt bad sending our waitress (car hop? non tipped server?) back to get ketchup, ranch, and BBQ, all of which were requested before she came out the first time. Cheese was on things that it wasn't supposed to be on, and good lord, do they really only have bathrooms that are outside?

So the food was ok, but nothing to make a trip about. No 50's music was playing and I didn't see the Fonz, so considering all of that... not worth a repeat trip.

When we got home, the guys got on Halo (well, still on Halo.) and I decided to be all domestic and make some chocolate chip cookies.

Here is the recipe:

• 1 cup butter, softened
• 1 cup white sugar
• 1 cup packed brown sugar
• 2 eggs
• 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
• 3 cups all-purpose flour
• 1 teaspoon baking soda
• 2 teaspoons hot water
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 2 cups semisweet chocolate chips
• 1 cup chopped walnuts
  

DIRECTIONS

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C).
2. Cream together the butter, white sugar, and brown sugar until smooth. Beat in the eggs one at a time, then stir in the vanilla. Dissolve baking soda in hot water. Add to batter along with salt. Stir in flour, chocolate chips, and nuts. Drop by large spoonfuls onto ungreased pans.
3. Bake for about 10 minutes in the preheated oven, or until edges are nicely browned.

The most AMAZING soup

Today is all thunderstorms and air that is just chilly enough to keep the windows shut. The one thing I miss about living on Douglas in the townhouse was the sound that the rain made on the roof... you could keep the windows clear of rain drops and watch the downpour out of the big window in the living room.

And then the basement would flood... ha.

At our new place, our ceilings are so big (14 feet...) that it's impossible to hear the rain, there isn't enough ledge to keep the water off the screen, and the damn screen in porch gets our giant speaker wet.

Today is dedicated to finishing up the homework that was due over spring break, starting my final paper (already!) and figuring out my class schedule at WMU for the fall. (16 credits and 2 extra classes at KVCC, oh my!) I have a feeling that if I wasn't living with Ryan I would not see him at all. And it's nice to come home to him yelling at his xbox. It's charming...

So today is just miserable, can't get into the book for my Women's Studies class, and something needed to be cooked. I thought about cookies (which might show up later) but this soup is the mose AMAZING thing I've made all week.

It smells fantastic when you start making it, the onions, the garlic, the peanut oil just smell delicious. Then you throw in the rest of the stuff, take off the heat, blend, and stir in the spices and corn.

It's nice because it starts off mild and sweet and just hits you with just a little spice at the end from the jalapeno, and bam, perfect little bright spot.

I made cornbread for it too... come over and eat this with me.

Sweet Potato, Corn and Jalapeño Bisque
Serves 2 if that's all there is for dinner, or 4 as a first course

1 tablespoon peanut oil
1/2 cup chopped onions
2 teaspoons minced garlic
3 medium sweet potatoes (about 2 1/2 pounds total), peeled and cut into 1-inch cubes
4 cups vegetable or chicken stock
1 medium jalapeño, seeded and finely chopped
1 cup fresh or frozen corn kernels
2 tablespoons molasses
1/2 tablespoon kosher salt
1/4 teaspoon ground cayenne
1/4 teaspoon black pepper
Scant pinch ground cinnamon
Finely chopped scallions, green parts only, or minced parsley

1. In a large saucepan or soup pot, heat oil over medium heat. Add onions and garlic and sauté until just soft, 2 to 3 minutes. Add sweet potatoes and stock and bring to a boil.

2. Reduce heat and simmer until potatoes are soft, about 10 minutes. Remove from heat. Using an immersion blender or a food processor, purée contents of pot, in batches if necessary, until smooth.

3. Reheat soup, stirring in jalapeño, corn, molasses, salt, cayenne, black pepper and cinnamon. Taste, adjust seasonings and serve, topped with scallions or parsley.

Pow Ka-Pow

MAJOR props to the Major of Lansing Virg Bernero who rips a Fox news anchor a new one.


Get 'em Virg!

Her mother does....

Pretty much why I decided to do a double major in Womens Studies....

The Poetry of the White Machine

So I got my boyfriend one of these things for christmas...


Now he plays Halo.


I write fiction on my laptop.


He says 'fuck' a lot.


So do the people in my stories.


Coincidence? I think not.

Pretty much how I feel...

If I have to study the Preface to Lyrical Ballads anymore tonight, I'm gonna look like him.

And yes, I know who that is.

What I want for Valentine's Day

My God, the new Kindle. Kindle 2.0. Bane of my existence. If anyone has a few hundred dollars to supplement Ry's Valentine's Day present fund, this is what I want.

Gimme.

Heaven Poopies

These are the cookies I am about to make. They're no-bake cookies, but I call them Heaven Poopies... a name my little sister decided was fitting.

Recipe below.

You will need:

2 cp sugar
1/2 cp cocoa
3/4 cp milk
1 tsp van
1/2 cp butter or 1/4 cp butter and 1/4 cp peanut butter
3 cp oats

1. Put everything but the oats into a big pot. Stir really fast or use a mixer for about a minute.

2. Put the heat on med. and boil the stuff for 1 min, stirring all the way.

3. Stir in the oats.

4. Keep on heat for 2 minutes, still stirring.

5. Poop them onto wax paper in little drops.

6. Refrain from eating right away because they're good hot, but not so good that you would like to burn your tongue.

7. Chill em by placing the cookies outside because it's winter, and my fridge doesn't have enough room.

The End.

Enjoy the Heaven Poops.

The Twilight Syndrome

How to break up with your 44 year old boyfriend who says he is a Vampyre:

Tell him that you are a Vampyre Hunter.

This is just getting weird...

Let's go from chauvinistic bikini to chauvinistic school girl...

Wow.

An even better way to not only reduce us to an image, but now a virtual one as well. I like how she can only say "I miss you." and, lo and behold, dances on cue. "None of my other girlfriends did that..." the reviewer laments...

Maybe because you think it's fun to dress us up in a chauvinistic bikini and a chauvinistic school girl outfit.

Lovely.

Because us women should stick together...

An Iraqi woman had 80 other women raped and then recruited them as suicide bombers by claiming that "martyrdom was the only way to escape the shame" of rape.

Charming.

I'm going to go have a drink.

This is why children get beat up at school.

No, amazon.com. I don't care if this is your gold box deal of the day. It's just wrong.

So... very... wrong.

You guys know this dosen't work with ANY black guy, right?

Michael Steele has won the election to be chairman of the Republican National Committee, becoming the first African-American to lead the party.

Quote of the Day

"Republicans don't like spending money on anything... unless it blows up. Like Iraq or Merrill Lynch."

--"Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me"

Knowing is half the battle.

New Year's Resolution

This new year I resolve to:

1: Eat yogurt.
2. Prune 1000 roses of their petals.
3. Lay naked whilst placing rose petals on my naughty bits.

Chicken, Beef, Pork, or Steak?

Oh no, ladies!

You will also be able to decide what to wear everyday, what to make for dinner, what tie you think will look good on him, and what brand of pantyhose to wear around the house until your husband comes home.

Have you heard of this word... It's all the rage...

Ah, so glad that the airlines finally discovered yet another way to interpret the MILF acronym.

Wish I was at that board meeting.

Here is my handle....

This is kind of cute... free books for stout girls. Now we have free... well, nothing.

I wish I was stout like that.

I'm a little tea pot...

Women in Advertisments

Alright, I know I'm beating a dead horse here, but this ad struck me as horribly offensive. I mean, look, it's enough that he's attracted to the car, but to put it over the girl's face? It dehumanizes her, shows her that not only is he unable or unwilling to give her any foreplay (and I think this might be a safe assumption, considering that not only is her bra on, but there isn't any sign of pleasure on her face... oh wait, you can't see her face because the asshole has put a CAR AD over it.)

I don't know about you, but if I was in the middle of sex with a man and I decided that I was going to put my 2189 page anthology of drama on his face (my version of a car I'd like to fuck with, of course) I don't think he'd be so docile as to lay there with his arms casually wrapped around my neck.

Doesn't it strike you as odd that BMW is the one releasing this ad? Axe Deodorant/Bodyspray/Shampoo/Bodywash and anything else that enables grown men and 14 year olds to smell like ass is a typical product that releases sexist ads that are demeaning towards women. I'm not excusing it, but it's expected.

But a car company?

Really?

I wish I had enough money so I could feel good for snubbing their company by not driving a car. Or maybe I'll snub them by not letting my boyfriend imagine fucking the grill and the headlights while we're in bed.